Coach Sam Falsafi welcomes two powerful leaders to the show today, Dr. Ed and Karen Osburn. They share stories of the unexpected twists and turns in their life, and demonstrate how they have chosen to rise and lead through their challenges.
Parable #1: Intro to Warrior
- Ed: I had started following Garrett on Facebook and got sucked into the matrix of his message for men. I felt he was speaking to me. I had a podcast for chiropractors at the time and reached out to Garrett to bring his message to the men because I felt they really needed it. That interview was transformational and indoctrinated us into the Warrior’s way.
- Karen: After the episode came out, Ed told me that he just did an interview with a guy in the Christian market. I wasn’t impressed until I listened to it. I remember being riveted by what Garrett was saying. What was this about having it all? There was something I couldn’t explain, a feeling in my heart.
What was your introduction to Warrior?
Parable #2: Wanting Power and Confidence
- It was on Ed’s 45th birthday while watching videos about Warrior Week that he mentioned to Karen that maybe he should go. He made a comment on Garrett’s facebook page, Garrett chimed in, and the next thing Ed knew, he was having conversations with both Sam and Garrett. Soon thereafter, Ed found himself knocking at the doors of Warrior Week 20, something Karen wanted for Ed more than Ed wanted for himself.
Karen: For me, I always saw Ed as a powerful man but I felt he didn’t see it in himself. I saw this as an experience where he could discover who he was as a man and show up as I wanted him to. I had seen a version of him in the past, that confident and certain Ed, but I didn’t feel he had the confidence at this point in his life.
How are you showing up for your wife?
Parable #3: Rise or Die
- Ed almost didn’t make it to Warrior Week. Two years after being diagnosed with Crohn’s disease, he had surgery where they removed most of his bowel except for 12 inches. “When I left Warrior Week 20, I had a decision to make: either succumb and just die to the disease, or rise. Even a lot of the guys were feeling that too: he’s either going to rise or die. So, I rose.”
- Ed returned to Warrior Week several times after that, each time coming away having shed the man he used to be and stepping into a new, expanded version of himself. “You have to stay in the game. If you don’t, you start to go back to sleep and become unconscious again. I could feel myself leaking power and felt I needed a kick in the dick. Almost every 12 months, I had to come back and experience the physical aspect and the bonding with the brothers.”
What challenges have you been able to rise above, seemingly against all odds?
Parable #4: Colliding Over Clarity
- Ed: Along with the power that we’re accessing, it has given me the power to collide with Karen. We don’t let things just sit. Moving forward, we would never want it to choose anything that would compromise something inside of our marriage that we have built. The power to collide is a good thing.
- Karen: We are always colliding over clarity. Right now, especially for me, I’m going through a shift. It feels like something new is percolating and building. It feels very unknown. I’m open. I’m surrendering. I believe I just need to fucking own it and trust it.
What is the difference between conflict and collision?
Parable #5: Behind Closed Doors
- Coach Sam: I grew up in a house where my mom and dad didn’t hug and kiss in front of us. Culturally, they were taught that you just don’t do that in front of people, that it’s meant to be kept hidden and private. After I had been operating that way in my marriage, I began questioning that belief. Kissing my wife three times a day became part of my 90-day challenge. I was rejected many times but I stayed consistent because I wanted to break through the belief I had adopted as a kid.
- Karen: A lot of people think they shouldn’t fight in front of their children. They don’t want to show that part of their relationship. I grew up in a family where the fighting took place behind closed doors. I say, show it. Show all of it. The biggest gift for me as a mom with my kids is that I have this little accountable thing with them where they see us fight, and see us make up. They see us get to model marriage for them.
What behaviors have you adopted from your childhood that no longer serve you?
Parables from the Pit:
“At the end of the day, whatever you’ve created is what you’re projecting onto your children. They are seeing this creativity, and therefore see the power, confidence, and certainty to create and recreate.”
— Coach Sam Falsafi
“I didn’t realize until about 12 hours into the first day of Warrior Week that I was actually there for my marriage. I thought I was there to learn how to hunt better. Once I made that shift – once I came back to build that connection and marriage I wanted – it only took a week for my business to change.
“I don’t want my kids to just follow, I want my kids to think for themselves. Although it’s a challenging way to parent compared to how most of the world rolls, it’s the most fulfilling when I hear my kids say things or call me out with feedback.”