Each week, Coach Sam and Coach Jesse delve into the pain of the modern man taken from the stories of the men who enter the gates of the crucible, Warrior Week.
In today’s episode, they have a conversation around this principle: Truth is something that evolves – what is true today for you, may not necessarily be true for you tomorrow. It’s constantly changing. Fear between truth and ourselves causes men to lie.
Parable #1: The Man in the Mirror
- Coach Sam: We know of a brother who is living a lie in order to get what he wants. He’s pretending inside of his relationship that no longer serves him in order to be able to be close to his kids.
- Coach Jesse: Ultimately, he wants a relationship with his kids and in the process of doing this, he’s lying to them, he’s lying to two women in his life, and most importantly he’s lying to the man in the mirror every fucking day.
What lies are you telling others in order to get what you want?
Parable #2: Three-Ring Circus
- Coach Jesse: Fears are driven from this place of money and this fear of lack or loss. In his case, if he is truthful, he won’t see his kids. If he’s not truthful, he will see his kids.
- Whether it’s money or a relationship, there’s this fear of if I do this, I will lose something. So, we continue down this path and ultimately find ourselves caught in this web of lies with no way out.
What is the paralyzing fear that causes you to become a fucking clown?
Parable #3: Web of Lies
- Coach Jesse: In this situation, the intention is I want to see my kids. But what happens when an intention comes from a lie is that it turns into manipulation.
- Coach Sam: It’s a fucked up cycle. He’s manipulating the kids to get what he wants. At the end of the day, his kids feel his bullshit, and the love he’s looking for is never going to get cultivated in that environment.
What good intentions of yours has backfired into a game of manipulation?
Parable #4: Shift
- Coach Sam: One of the possibilities is to shift and to leave this fucking pit; to release himself from this web of lies. With this, there may be a price to pay – they may not want to see him for a while. Sometimes the void and the gap is what it takes.
- The fear can cause us to stay in the pit, and empowers us to dig even deeper. There’s power in fear and there’s also a paralyzation within that fear.
What is the price you’re paying for cultivating love in an environment of manipulation?
Parable #5: Your Way Out
- Coach Sam: When you are caught in a web, begin by cutting one strand at a time. Sometimes you may require help from the outside: men that will help set you free much faster than you could have done it on your own.
- Coach Jesse: One of the ways out of this web of lies is to have someone mirroring back to you what you’re doing. Once you are aware of being a manipulator you are no longer acting out of ignorance.
What is the message someone is mirroring back to you?
Parables from the Pit:
“As we share these stories and parables with you each week, our invitation to you is to give yourself permission to explore that pain inside of you. If you were triggered by anything today, explore that.”
— Coach Sam Falsafi
“Whatever you fear losing, there’s a feeling attached to that. If you look into that deeper, you’ll find the truth that needs to be told.”
–Coach Jesse Ewell